Living together before getting married
Couples start knowing each other on a closer, more personal level when they live together, which prepares them for a married lifestyle. It’s also called cohabitation. Cohabitation is an arrangement where two unrelated people live together. Many couples like to live together before marriage because they want to test compatibility before marrying, they think living together is a good way to avoid divorce and because cohabitation is easier to establish and dissolve. But in fact, cohabitation may be very harmful. Before deciding live together, you should think of carefully these following things.
First, consider not living together at all before marriage because up to now there is no evidence that if you decide to cohabit before marriage you will have a stronger marriage than those who don’t live together. Cohabitation is only least harmful when both partners are definitely planning to marry, have formally announced their engagement and have picked a wedding date.
The second, do not make a habit of cohabiting. Be aware of the dangers of multiple living together experiences, both for your own sense of well being and for your chances of establishing a strong lifelong partnership.
The third, limit cohabitation to the shortest possible period of time. Finally, do not cohabit if children are involved. Children need to have parents who stay together over the long term. Cohabiting parents break up at a much higher rate than married parents and the effects of breakup can be long lasting. Moreover, children of the cohabiting couples broken up live with stepfathers or mother’s boyfriends are at higher risk of physical violence than are children living with married biological parents.
First, consider not living together at all before marriage because up to now there is no evidence that if you decide to cohabit before marriage you will have a stronger marriage than those who don’t live together. Cohabitation is only least harmful when both partners are definitely planning to marry, have formally announced their engagement and have picked a wedding date.
The second, do not make a habit of cohabiting. Be aware of the dangers of multiple living together experiences, both for your own sense of well being and for your chances of establishing a strong lifelong partnership.
The third, limit cohabitation to the shortest possible period of time. Finally, do not cohabit if children are involved. Children need to have parents who stay together over the long term. Cohabiting parents break up at a much higher rate than married parents and the effects of breakup can be long lasting. Moreover, children of the cohabiting couples broken up live with stepfathers or mother’s boyfriends are at higher risk of physical violence than are children living with married biological parents.
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